well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Randomize
