I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
Randomize
