i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
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