Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
Bad news. Pictures just stimulated my memory and i just realized the stripper I hooked up with this weekend tasted like pizza.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
