Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
you never un-have a 4some
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