ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
