The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
I have already put on my inside pants.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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