Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
