im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
