I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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