I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
