they need to just BURY HIM!
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
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