Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
