Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
