he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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