The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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