we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Walked into this guys room, saw a tickle me elmo under his desk with white stains in its mouth. This is awkward.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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