in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
