Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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