stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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