all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
