I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize