Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
