Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Randomize
