508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Dear god my vagina.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
