Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
