I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
when i woke up i was missing $380 from my bank account
damn...impressive bar tab
no i guess i bought a gasoline powered blender off ebay, i need a breathalyzer for my computer
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Of course I have a pirate flag
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
