need another drink. this is the easiest way
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
