i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
