i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
