Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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