In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
Randomize
