someone get that fucking seahorse.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Nothing says Merry Christmas like gifting a bottle of rum and finishing it yourself then leaning over at the dinner table to puke it back up.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
