I hate you but I'm not in hate with you
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
Randomize
