She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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