Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
