my sisters under your porch take her home
No more Irish car bombs ever.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
