real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
