great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
