so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
