I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
