Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
