please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I canceled a date last night to eat pop tarts and go to bed early
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
Randomize
