Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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