It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize