yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Randomize
