Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
