I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
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