Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
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