yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
