i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
