So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
