She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize
